I was born lucky me, in a land that I love-though I am poor I am free. Victorriaaa!

Today and yesterday I have been cycling around Colchester, and as there has been good weather I have managed to appreciate the town again. Yesterday I cycled along the Wivenhoe trail (http://www.stacey.peak-media.co.uk/WivenhoeTrail/WivenhoeTrail.htm) that runs from the small village of Wivenhoe, through University and then into town. I must admit that I never used to walk (or cycle) anywhere before I met Vuokko, but now I cant imagine taking a bus to town or uni ...well unless its raining. For me its mad that people want to take their cars into town when such a path exists. So today I went for another cycle around the trail to tescos and back and It really is amazing how such a small thing can make you feel so much better.

Apart from cycle-therapy, I feel I have to say something about Ray Davies and The Kinks. Over the last few weeks I have been listening to a few of their albums which have really made me feel happy and patriotic as well as sick of England. The kinks have never been as big as they should have been, and although their greatest hits are good it doesn't really do them any justice. all in all it has got me thinking lately: was England in the 60's that great? The 60's are always portrayed as the decade that would end all post war trauma and upset and replace it with peace, love and harmony-but not according to Ray. Many say that the kinks were rejected by the 60's, but i believe that they rejected the 60's. Theres song after song of cynical punchlines about living on a small island that believed it was something better than what it actually was. The sad thing is that its still happening now.

Work, Work, Work, Stress, Stress, Stress.

Yesterday was the last day of the term. Time to panic. At this point from all the classes I have attended I should not only know what I am going to do with dissertation but also my life in general. This big question always bothers me because I just don't know. I think Ive done quite well this year, its been tough and i feel that the two terms have taken their toll on me. These next few weeks are not going to get any better, in fact i think it will get worse. I have lots of work to do as well as fitting in part time work to pay my way. I have four essays for the end of April, which i have calculated as 7-9 days per essay, then there's the PhD applications and dissertation preparations.

Back to the big question. I cant make my mind up. I want to do a PhD but I also want to gain some solid work experience. I don't know what the answer is. I have applied to some internships in Brussels and Luxembourg and I will start to look into other work placements over the next few weeks. I'm hoping that all of this will throw me an answer. I feel that If I chose work experience over the PhD then I should at the very least have a job that is relevant to my interests. There's lots out there, I just have to grab it.

Bugs In The Cupboard.

Its been a bastard of a week and I'm hoping that this week is better. Last week: Vuokko's bike was stolen, we had to throw away 3 bags of food from our cupboards due to bugs and what not, we have bills coming out of our ears and to top it all off the conservative party made a strong gain in the Finnish Parliament that may lead to a conservative/middle coalition. (The saddest factor is that the left party for the first time since 1945 will be the opposition).

In our own way we both manage to pick one another up. When one is upset the other is there to say that its not too bad and there is always light at the end of the tunnel, but last week was one long slope downwards. OK, OK, The bugs in the cupboard, a stolen bicycle and a right wing government aren't exactly the biggest troubles one can have, but these are metaphors of the times - even though we have next to nothing, life manages to kick us in the teeth. On that positive note I will have a shower and go to bed.

Yesterday I managed to land a job for the night as an email collector at a gig in town. I'm quite shocked that I got this job as these vacancies usually get snapped up quite quickly. The work required this: to write down as many peoples names and emails as possible within 3 hours whilst they watch a few bands. I had seen these email-people a lot at campus gigs and in London and I've always thought, bloody hell look at him... what a nice job you have. So once I recieved my job outline at the jobshop on campus i thought to myself, piece of piss! Easy! Well....not quite. I was about to enter the weird world of audience targeted PR. OK OK I'm not exactly Max Clifford, but still it was hard and I felt like a charlatan, walking around, telling lies desperately pleasing anyone who would give me their personal details. Most were pleased to sign-up, some were even excited ('oh great, cheers, yeah nice one mate, brilliant, thanks...'), however others could not bare to look at me-as if I were the devil himself.. 'naa fanks mate'. These I enjoyed the most. They would cut in before I'd even have time to draw breath and open my mouth. All in all it was a difficult balancing act and I quickly lost patience and saliva in my mouth to carry on. I skedaddled a little earlier than expected, handed a few flyers at the door and zoomed of feeling a bit guilty and weird. I didn't enjoy what I did last night, and I'm glad I've never desired a PR/talking to people type job. If I felt dirty and cheap after two hours, god knows what it is like doing it week in week out.

On the plus side I saw a good live band, which of course is a rarity. www.myspace.com/thehoosiers

Apart from that, ive been listening to the Kinks day in day out. Im sure the honeymoon will end with this band but at the moment Im besotted with Ray Davies and his witty little mouth.

An Inconvenient Truth

I just finished watching Al Gore's An Inconvenient Truth. Its quite easy to knock a documentary and pick holes in it but this was everything I wanted it to be and overall I have to take my hat off to him.

The film more or less looks at what we are doing to the planet and what we can do to stop global warming. It has a simple narrative but the facts and figures are relentless, one after the other they knock you off your feet. From CO2 emissions to the breakdown of Antarctic peninsulas-it explains everything. There's also a lot of interludes that reveal parts of Gores private life and motivation for the lectures and documentary. Throughout all of this you cant help but wonder what is going through Bush's mind, what does he think when he sees this?! You also cant help but think what a modest and humble man Gore is. He's been pushing these ideas all of his life, its not as if one day he woke up and decided to cash in on the global warming wagon (like many others have) -yet still he retains a mild temperament merely urging each of us that we can do a little to change our planet. And lets not also forget the fact that he lost to inept baffoon that is Georgie Bush. Ahhh nevermind.

God Save Strawberry Jam And All The Different Varieties

Last night I managed to download all of the Kinks albums-this is great news for me. I have recently got back into the Kinks after listening to a copy of Lola vs The Powerman. I have been a fan for a long time but this has only been based on the greatest hits that my dad possessed in his record collection. I remember very well when I first heard it. In fact I see it now, sitting in the CD rack-its yellow and red (slightly cracked) cover with the kinks on the cover in their early years smiling away at the camera. It had all of their hits as well the years they were released and strangely their chart position in both UK and US. I played it over and over and over again, but somehow I managed to get into the Beatles before the Kinks which now leaves me over 10 albums to catch up on.

I cant exactly say what it is about this band that makes them so special. Of course all the music gurus out there will say 'its because they never made it in America, and stuck to English patriotic lyrics'. For me its much more than that. They are so cynical and witty, they write about the good and bad things in the UK as well as the everyday observations. With that there is the darker side to it-although the sixties were in full swing, Ray Davies was quite depressed and saw that period as a superficial time and so decided to write about what was really happening on this Island. He also had an understanding of England's past and future (Victoria, Apeman) which was way ahead of anything that was being written at the time. On top of all of this negativity was this cheeky smile and woderful melodies which somehow managed to balance the Kinks presence. And this is how it works... http://youtube.com/watch?v=J6ROIbhD4Ls

Apart from the (free) Kinks download I have been quite busy at University. This term is in full flow now, with the essay titles being released so now i have to start to write them. On top of this i am completely skint. This isnt anyhting new but its an added problem that i could do without. Being poor does however have its upsides: I know that i wont always be hopelessly poor, and I know that this will pass and I will work and have money. But the thing is that I wont forget this skintness and I will stick to the same budget and tricks that poverty has taught me. Theres too many people out there who are just wasting money on useless or excessive things. Outside HMV today i saw a sign that read '8 Days 'til PS3 (or some other computer)..reserve yours NOW!' I also saw overweight people eating hotdogs, bimbos with 10 seperate clothes bags, men with hands-free kits in their ears...etc etc.

Anyway I have to do some work tonight otherwise I'll have more to do when I do get a job.

Nick Griffin:A plumber from Basildon.

Last night I went to campus to see a mini festival held in the Universities three main venues. The festival, entitled 'Love Music, Hate Racism' was a mixture of music genres, from Indie to Beatbox and trip-hop. In all, it was one of the best nights that the Union have organised, however I have to say that there was a lack of punters, compared to the usual Saturday night mainstream dribble that is spewed from the clubs week in, week out. One of my friends commented that we shouldn't expect too much from uncultured Essex students, but i think what was more shocking is that no one was there for such a good cause. The campus is notoriously packed at the weekend which usually puts me off from going, but the only time you really want the campus to be full-its half empty. Furthermore essex is one of the most multicultural Universities in the UK. So whats going on here??

The venues were full of flyer's, free Cd's and leaflets, stating BNP facts and figures- there was even the chance to register your vote against the far right parties. Apart from the music it was a good chance to let yourself become aware of the madness that is going on in this country. Today I have been looking at the BNP's Manifesto/Policy and website www.bnp.org.uk/ . Again I'm shocked and scared as to what these nutters have got to say for themselves. I think everyone pretty much knows the deal with this bunch, but when you start to read deeper you realise that they really are morons. For example one article read 'Viking descendants defend their town against Muslim encroachment'. So Vikings are different to Muslims? They're both immigrant groups!

I really shouldn't waste my time on their website but I had to take a look and see what their plans are for the future. For the record Nick Griffin (BNP leader) sees himself as a working class hero, however he grew up in a middle class village in Suffolk and then went on to read law at Cambridge. The truth is it looks like a bunch of builders have drawn up the policy papers with a crayon whilst leaning on The Sun.