Read on if you like cheese....

Since I started Uni I began to think that everyone I met had an impact on my life. This is true and can be proven through the people I have met. Most people don’t stay very long, in fact I may have only known someone for a couple of months before they went back to their own country. Some people come and go and some stay for a long time. Anyway, my point is that everyone has their little part or role in shaping me or making me think differently. I haven’t really met anyone new in a while but now I am at work I have met people who I would never have met before. People from different class and creed, from different backgrounds etc.. One of them I sit next to everyday at work. If it wasn’t for him I think my job would be completely boring and I would lose the will to live by 10. The chap I sit next to is cool and although he comically looks 37, he is my age so we get on ok. We probably wouldn’t have crossed paths outside of work as he is an artistic actor type person and I am a boring law person. My point is that this one guy has kept me a sane in a dull job and I have learnt a lot about stuff I would never have known (like the ins and outs of being a struggling actor and what its like to be ginger), and hopefully he has in some way learnt something from me. Eventually we will go our own ways and maybe never see each other again, which is sad, but at the same time how life goes. Just like others who have been and gone, I think of them and smile, or pull a funny face, or sigh and think ‘what the hell was he/she about?’ And so the circle goes…people come and go and, some with impact, others without (going to the extreme of corniness!!) we live and learn etc etc the end.

So that’s what I was thinking about today.

Even good news is bad news.

London, I guess, is a bit like one of those slot machines in amusement parks-the ones where the shelves slide on top of each other and when you put money in you have a chance of getting some out. Ha! The trick is though that if you dont know where to put the money (or if you run out o money) you probably wont win much. In fact you will probably lose all your money and think 'what was the point in that?' Right now that's almost how I feel, but not quite. Im willing to give this adventure a run for its money (no pun intended).

The title of this update refers to the news I got today. My tutor emailed me to say that I had got the GTA teaching post at uni for one hour a week. At first I was thrilled, but then I started to realise that it wasn't really worth doing-the money I would get would barely pay for the train and my lunch. It would of course be a great experience and it would look great on the CV. But I really have to think things through.

This then got me thinking on the bus home. My problems are ridiculously trivial compared to others-but- other peoples woes are ridiculous in comparison to mine. I cant start my Phd for financial reasons, in fact I still havent paid for my masters yet. You could say that im living well beyond my means. In all honesty I dont mind, im doing something I want to do. Im living in London, im experiencing it all and Im going to give it a try. I will pay my debts and go on living. Of course there are many people out there who dont have a degree let alone any education, or a roof over their heads, so therefore my woes are trivial to the extreme. However there are people out there who dont know how lucky they are and have what they desire but still complain. I brush pass them everyday to work, I even know a few. Nonetheless I will continue in this London experience (thats what it has become in conversations and in my mind) and I will try my best to start the Phd whether its at in the UK or elsewhere.

Right then.. a quick round up of the last month or so..

I cant sum up has happened as not much has really happened but at the same time a huge part of my life ended (leaving colchester) and a new chapter begun (moving to London). I, at least, left Finland feeling a bit anxious about the whole thing but now I feel at least partially integrated into a London life. We have a bedsit in North London and ive even managed to get a temp job in the civil service working for the VOA (council tax to me and you..) which overall is much more than I ever anticipated. Two Mondays ago Vuokko had a rash and headache so therefore went into hospital with suspected meningitis which threw us both off balance. The rash/headache didnt turn out to be meningitis but she has been feeling terrible since. I have seen her go through quite a lot of physical pain over they ears and she usually handles everything thrown at her but this was something else. The pain climaxed a few days after her being discharged from hospital and ultimately she broke down in pain and frustration.

The hospital couldnt work any of it out and by the end of the week the best analysis was exhaustion. So now we are here in Islington finally back to normal, however it would be an understatment to say that the last few weeks were hard and that actually 'living' here hasnt started yet. Im still physically and mentally tired from it all and hopefully this next week will be a return to normality.

My job is quite dull but the civil service was something I couldn't turn down and is something that i could hopefully progress in but we'll see. I will be there until at least the end of december so if anything it will be a good bit of experience. Apart from that theres not much to report. Tomorrow we're going to see a dutch (danish?!) band called 'Oh No Ono'.

This wasnt the best update but its the best i could muster up right now!

Blimey, I havent updated in a while. This is mainly because I dont have internet at home and the swines at work have blocked my net usage. I will hopefully fill in the gaps in the next few days.